Posts Tagged ‘assistance’

As the holidays approach us – remember that if you need

errand running, event planning, house-sitting, house cleaning,

pet  walking, pet-sitting, chores  – YES WE DO IT!

For each new client that you refer to us –

with any purchased package

You get $25 CASH!

When a loved one passes away, there are arrangements and decisions to be made. This can be a difficult time emotionally, and managing the details can be overwhelming. Below is a list of the initial process that needs to take place, but remember you aren’t alone. Two More Hands can assist you through this difficult time, managing many of these tasks.

1. The Funeral Home
   One of the first calls to be made to is to a funeral home. If the deceased is in a hospital (or other kind of care setting), the facility’s staff will make these calls for you, although you will need to decide which mortuary service you would like to use. The staff at the funeral home will then take the lead and work with you and the other with family members to orchestrate the details of the care of the body, the service, and burial.
    
2. Clergy
   After the funeral home has been contacted; you will usually need to call a member of the clergy (if the deceased has an affiliation). A pastor or minister will usually conduct the religious service; however, funeral homes often have a staff member who can lead a service if a religious service is not a good fit. This person can also handle arranging speakers to do a eulogy, (read more about writing a eulogy)
    
3. Determine Budget
   The cost of funeral arrangements can be staggering, and cost of burial can be an indelicate discussion. However, funeral homes generally provide a variety of services and product options to try to meet most budgets. However, a traditional funeral at minimum costs about $6,000, (funds are often available for a “pauper funeral” when necessary).

   Clergy will often not charge a set amount for their services, but an honorarium is customary for clergy, musicians and other professionals whose services may be engaged. This is something that most funeral homes will include as part of funeral home charges and make these payments for you. Just be sure to ask to avoid any uncomfortable situations.
    

4. Informing friends and family

Many people will find out about a death of a friend of family member through word-of-mouth, but don’t assume everyone will just get the message. Be sure to personally call (or have a close family member call) those who should be told of the death immediately. Have an obituary placed in the local newspaper, and any paper that may hold significance for the deceased (former hometowns, etc.) Include the details of the service and where donations should be directed, (Read more about writing an obituary).

Once these initial details are handled, it is time to take a moment to grieve and work through the emotion of your loss. You may want to seek out the comfort of family, or clergy yourself. The next few days and week will be trying, so don’t hesitate to seek help.

Please give Two More Hands a call at (704) 804-1761 to assist you during this difficult time and to celebrate the life of your loved one in a way that is least stressful for you.

Writing an Obituary

Customary information includes:

1. Full legal name of the deceased (nickname may be included in parenthesis)
2. City or town of residence
   1. To avoid having the residence robbed while the family is attending the calling hours and funeral, specific information about the residence of the deceased and relatives should never be published.
3. Relative list including:
   1. Predeceased list (relatives who have died)
   2. Survived by list (relatives that are still alive)
      1. Parents
      2. Sons
      3. Daughters
      4. Grandchildren
      5. Great Grandchildren
      6. Sisters
      7. Brothers
4. Work history
5. Place and time of the funeral and any calling hours
6. Place of burial
7. Optional information could include:
   1. Special interests such as hobbies
   2. Associations (such as membership in local or national organizations.
   3. Special Affiliations (such as volunteer work for the A.S.P.C.A., etc.)
   4. Military service

Obituaries can be written at the time of death or before. Many people find it helpful to write their own obituary notice in advance for the following reasons:

1. The surviving family members might not remember, or may struggle to remember, specific dates (birth, employment, retirement, previous deaths).
2. They might not know proper spellings of people’s names, places, companies or organizations.
3. They might not know all of the deceased’s memberships to volunteer organizations and community clubs.
4. The self-written obit could specify a favorite charity for donations that the surviving family wouldn’t have thought of.